Standing in love for 39 years – it’s so much more than falling!

What shall we say about such wonderful things as these? If God is for us, who can ever be against us? – Romans 8:31

On this day 39 years ago, on a sizzling hot sultry Florida afternoon, Rebekah and I said “I-do” to each other and set the ball rolling on something remarkable. Over the previous couple of years we had met, lost our balance, stumbled, fallen in love, righted ourselves, fallen again, and finally realized that what we really wanted to do was to stand in love. So we helped each other up and began this amazing season of leaning on one another, falling, teetering, anchoring ourselves together, and learning to love while trying to maintain our balance; but always falling, constantly falling, wonderfully falling.

After almost four decades there is a kind of tempo that has emerged, a cadence to the dance. Point and counterpoint, ebb and flow, strength and weakness, give and take, take stock and reboot, grace upon grace. What becomes necessary to keep us dancing is a deep grounding, a rock solid core, a gravitational center that constantly works to keep us upright and standing strong.

1-IMG_0709We stand not because of ourselves but because we are rooted in a faith stronger and more weighty than both of us put together. To say “our love is enough” would be to miss the point. So instead we say, “God’s grace is sufficient,” and “when we lose our balance we fall into the gravitational pull of God’s love,” and in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For we are convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord…” – Romans 8

Falling in love is fun stuff – mad, irrepressible, overwhelming, exhilarating, anxious; but standing in love is more satisfying, fulfilling, deep, always growing, rooted, full with hope and promise, rich, engaged, and confident.

30 years on

A friend recently told me that the opposite of love is indifference. Indifference left my life the moment I met Rebekah. I can laugh, I can cry – but I can never be indifferent; how could I be when I am so deeply rooted in something this alive, this vital, this amazing

So here I stand. Here we stand. Confident. Still dancing. Still thrilled. Still wondering where this journey will take us next…

… In love, because of love – Derek





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  1. Wonderfully worded indeed — and straight from the heart of the matter. With your permission I would like to use it in my ministry: wedding consultations, maybe even a sermon feature ! Okay ?

    Liked by 1 person

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