My brothers and sisters, God chose you to be free. But don’t use your freedom as an excuse to do what pleases your sinful selves. Instead, serve each other with love. The whole law is made complete in this one command: “Love your neighbor the same as you love yourself.” If you continue hurting each other and tearing each other apart, be careful, or you will completely destroy each other. – Galatians 5:13-15
“If you would be unwilling to meet in person, over coffee, and say what you’re about to post on Facebook, then it simply should not be said.” – me
Twenty-four years ago today the Tampa Tribune ran my commentary in response to the 9-11 attacks. I was a weekly columnist in several local editions (Brandon, Temple Terrace, Carrollwood, West Tampa, Sun City, Plant City…) and editors sometimes asked me to weigh in on the main pages.
I heard from them mid-afternoon the day the Twin Towers fell. “Derek. Do you have anything for us?” “Already working on it,” I replied, and when my commentary ran September 12 it generated a wide-ranging response.
I mention this today for a couple of reasons. First, the Charlie Kirk shooting is the kind of event the Trib would have asked me to comment on. Mostly because they knew my perspective would present both challenge and hope to conservative and progressive readers alike. Also, they knew they could count on me to look at events through a different lens.
The other reason is the hate-mail. One was so egregious I wrote the man back, gave him my phone number, and told him I expected him to apologize and take back his threats before the end of the day. He called me right away, I told him I understood the emotion he was feeling, and then we had a really positive conversation.
The past couple of days, reading so many unfortunate exchanges on social media in response to the Kirk shooting, I am reminded of the following truth: If you would be unwilling to meet in person, over coffee, and say what you’re about to post on Facebook, then it simply should not be said.
The Kirk Shooting:
The Kirk shooting is symptomatic of a deeper problem in our culture, one that is growing. It has nothing to do with being conservative or progressive and everything to do with a long erosion of trust in the fundamental values that once defined us.
It has nothing to do with being conservative or progressive and everything to do with a long erosion of trust in the fundamental values that once defined us.
It’s the movement away from dialogue and into diatribe, away from listening and toward lecturing, away from conversation and into confrontation. The companion issue is a shameless disregard for both law and common standards of decency.
What I’m saying is that this is not a simple question of, “Let’s not shoot people with opposing viewpoints.” This is one more place on a long slippery slope – occupied by Republicans and Democrats alike.
When rhetoric (and behavior) deliberately and systematically seeks to erode trust, sow confusion, ferment unrest and undermine the rule of law, then we have moved into a status quo where dangerous alternatives to reason and trust and respectful disagreement are now the norm.
Simply put, it is hard for our leaders to demand law and order and respect and decency when they fail to honor these benchmarks themselves.
it is hard for our leaders to demand law and order and respect and decency when they fail to honor these benchmarks themselves.
We must expect better. We must do better. We must all – each one of us – model the quality of behavior toward folk we’re at odds with that we want to experience ourselves. The future of free society is, I believe, hanging in the balance.
I am wrong about stuff all the time. It’s okay to take issue with what I say and where I stand. But there is a right way and a wrong way to disagree, and this violence is just one more symptom of a dangerous slide away from the underlying code of decency that held us together for so long.
Peace, and I mean that in every way – DEREK
Thank you Derek! That was a very poignant message I have been praying about these past few days. We need a dialogue, things we would say face to face as you stated. I hope you don’t mind, but I have shared your words on my social media today hoping that we can begin to form a behavior of the world as it could and should be. Blessings to you and your family!
Much appreciated, Scott! This is certainly the time for people of faith to be salt and light instead of pouring more gas on the fire!
Thank you for this article.
Good post. I’ve never heard of the guy and I looked him up. Didn’t find anything racist or facist or whatever they’re saying about him but found someone who sought out dialogue and coversation and was kind and didn’t insult or make fun off the person he was talking to. It seems his thing wasn’t about making speaches or whatever but having conversations with people about various issues of the day. What a tragedy!
I remember when President Kennedy was assassination what a terrible shock and tragedy. My father served in WW11, Normandy invasion, and European campaign. Both my father and President Kennedy were combat veterans, both husbands and fathers, one a republican and the other a Democrat. Their political beliefs and differences meant nothing to us and to many others who mourned the senseless loss of our President and “leader of the free world”. What has happened to us?