So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up. Therefore, whenever we have the opportunity, we should do good to everyone… – Galatians 6:9-10

If you start reading then conclude this post is about you, then I’d say you’re right, it probably is. But not you specifically, it’s actually about almost everybody. So don’t worry, nobody is going to have you in mind!

This is, by the way, a concept I have taught off and on for years. Always, however, it seems to come across as a novel idea.

Imagine a person who behaves in a certain way. They are unkind, or rude or crass; maybe mean or ill-tempered. I’m sure you know someone – it may even be you. Then they say things like, “Sorry but this is just who I am,” as if there really is no option, or as if being more positive or kind would somehow be inauthentic.

To which I say, “Bull-Hooey.”

The roots of this idea come from my history and experience in Behavioral Therapy, working with children who were failing not because of who they were but because of their behavior. Not who they were but how they were.

This is important: the problem is not who you are but what you do…

“You are not in my class because you are a bad person, you are here because your behavior hurts others and disrupts the learning environment.” What we found was that when my students learned to behave appropriately they also started to see themselves as more kind, nice, successful and likable too.

Turns out kindness is not just a choice thing but a momentum thing too.

This absolutely works!

What if we simply made the choice to be nice, to be kind, to be positive, to be non-confrontational? Even if it doesn’t feel natural at first. Wouldn’t it be true that, after working hard at acting like this nicer version of ourselves, we will – eventually – actually be a more loving and pleasant human being?

Like the man who told me, “I’m sure I would treat my wife better if I loved her more…” And I responded with, “Start treating her better, consistently, and you will find that you do love her more.”

This approach may require hard work, but isn’t it worth it? We can take charge of our own future and choose not to live as hapless victims of past choices, choices that worked to create the imperfect version of ourselves we now feel stuck with.

We can create “MeVersion2.0” with just a little discipline and a lot of commitment. Because, and this is very important to understand, we do not have to be victims of our own past. The next page of our story is entirely ours to write.

So commitment, discipline, hard work and prayer too. And about that prayer thing? I’m thinking maybe a lot – DEREK

We do not have to be victims of our own past. The next page of our story is entirely ours to write.