First, thanks so much for all the prayer, the well-wishes, the supportive comments, and the sensitivity expressed in response to yesterday’s post – Big Changes as my Mum moves to Assisted Living.
The move in went well. You can see from the photos here that it really is a lovely place. Mum’s room came together beautifully, the staff were/are wonderful, she had a good night, and she did well at the breakfast table chatting with the other residents.
But I have also received (as of breakfast this morning) three very difficult phone calls from her. I understand this is a common occurrence in response to this level of change, but I have to say the level of “Punch son in gut, insert knife, twist. Pause. Repeat…” is difficult to say the least.
So there you have it. Now I need a helpful scripture. Here’s a good one. I’ll hang my hat on this for the near future.
May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.
Romans 15:13
Peace – for all of us – DEREK
Derek and Rebekah,
This was certainly a difficult decision, but made with genuine, intensive love for your Mum, as well as a breather for you two as you enjoy each other and your wonderful family.
My parents died pretty young (71 and 72) and I can’t personally comprehend your feelings when Mum calls.
I’m offering prayers for all of you as you experience this transition again.
Warmth and God’s continued presence,
Deb
Thanks so much, Deb. Rebekah also lost hers fairly young (73 and 80). This really is an interesting time! Thanks for your love and prayers
Derek, This transition period is going to be the toughest–at least it was for me. As your Mum gets more used to her surroundings and become friends with other residents and staff, things will improve. One advantage that I had was that Miriam did not have access to a phone and they told me not to visit for two weeks. That was extremely tough for me but they knew what they were doing. My prayers are with you and your Mum but things will calm down over time and this situation will improve. You are doing the best thing for your Mum and for everyone as this facility can provide 24/7 care which is impossible for any single caregiver. God Bless Derek and tell Rebekah hello.
Sending loving prayers, Derek and Rebekah, and Mum! From cousin Mary in Rocky Mount
Prayers and peace and love.
Transitions are so hard and the phone calls can be tormenting. Trust you’ve made to best decision and things will improve. Sending lots of love.
I was kept out of the decision making for my parents, but I still got the phone calls. My heart goes out to you. Blessing to you, Rebekah and your mother.
Transition is very hard. When you are young and get your driver’s license, a car, and independence it is very exciting. A young adult moves out their parent’s home and becomes independent. But when you are older and slower and start losing your independence, it is very difficult for all concerned. Roles are reversed between the parent and their child. All the fear of losing control of one’s live comes to the forefront of the mind.
My nieces and nephew had to make the difficult decision, to move my sister who has Alzheimers into a memory care center. She made threats to them but it was clear she could no longer live on her own. She constantly attempted to return home. It has been some months and she is now doing much better with consistent care and supervision. She is much happier and doing much better. Her kids were afraid as she made threats but it is so much better now. Know the transition will take some time, but your mum will adjust and thrive in her new setting. Praying for all of you and that the fear would leave your mum.
Thanks for this. Much appreciated. Prayers very much needed going forward….
Yes, lifting you and your mum up in prayer.